Feeling God’s favour

To say that Jasmine grew up in a broken home would be an understatement. Her mother died when she was just six years old and shortly afterwards, she was sexually abused by two family members. Her alcoholic father was known for his violent outbursts. She grew up in ‘survival mode’ and turned to drugs and alcohol at the age of 13 for comfort.

By 14, she was homeless; by 16, she was pregnant with no life skills. She moved in with her boyfriend and gave birth to her daughter at 17. She had always wanted to be a mum and thought it would change her life. It didn’t.

By 18, Jasmine was hitting harder drugs and her relationship ended. She was homeless again and regularly found herself in the watchhouse. She was unreliable and rarely saw her daughter, who remained in the care of her ex-partner.

Then one day Jasmine was at a friend’s house, who was also a drug dealer, when the police burst in and conducted a raid. This ‘friend’ signed a statement claiming all the drugs were Jasmine’s. She was arrested and sentenced.

Jasmine found herself crying in the back of the police car. Her first thought was, “I’m going to miss Christmas with my daughter.” In reality, she wouldn’t have been sober enough to see her.

She attempted suicide in the watchhouse, and was isolated for her first few weeks in prison. She hated God and blamed Him for everything that had happened to her. The abuse, neglect, even the prison sentence for someone else’s crime.

The only time Jasmine had ever prayed was when she was playing pokies. She would pray under her breath, “God, if you help me win, I’ll follow you.” But of course, she didn’t win.

Something drew Jasmine to a chapel service in prison. She was taken aback, watching one of the chaplains dancing and singing with joy during worship. Jasmine thought she looked crazy, but so free, and she wanted to experience that.

Jasmine joined a conversation with the chaplain, Debbie, after the service. The other women were asking questions like, “If God is real, why did my mum die?” The chaplain handled all these difficult questions with such grace, and Jasmine found herself thinking, “What if there IS a God?”

She asked Debbie about forgiveness. She was finally able to forgive her abusers and release herself from the prison of bitterness and anger.

Jasmine said: “That chaplain was the first person who ever loved me. I’d never known anyone who would give and not expect anything in return.”

It took a while for Jasmine to trust God. Eventually, she felt God’s favour.

On her release from prison, Jasmine was able to get a job in a kitchen. But Jasmine didn’t keep her promises to God. She stayed clean but didn’t join a church as she had intended.

Her father contacted her and wanted her help to get drugs. At first, she refused but he was persistent, so she took him to a house where drugs were sold. They were both caught and Jasmine returned to prison, but this time was different. She was ready to give her whole self to God.

She knew God had a plan for her. She decided she would take the hope she had found back to prison.

Today, Jasmine has now been ‘out’ for three years. She was baptised at her local church, which she attends regularly. She started her own business cleaning houses, and is working on her relationship with her daughter.

Jasmine said: “If I didn’t have chaplains in jail, there would have been no one to tell me about God. In my mess, I didn’t think there was a better life, and if there was, I didn’t deserve it.”

Thanks to prison chaplains, Jasmine now has that better life she never thought possible – and her future is full of hope.